I read this the other day....it really hit me. Being a mother is one of the most trying "jobs" in the world but definitely the most important and most rewarding. I need to seek out the good things and hold on for dear life. I NEED to live more in the "now".
“…the biggest mistake I made is the one that most of us make…I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of the three of [my children] sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages 6, 4, and 1. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less.”
--Anna Quindlen
Her daily motherhood tasks are done…nothing but a faded memory. It’s true that mothers always have a never-ending list of things to do. We check off the things on our lists that we “get done,”…Pay the bills. Do the ironing. Clean the house. Do the shopping. But are we really accomplishing our goals if we didn’t notice the look on our child’s face as he just did a "cool trick" on his scooter that he had practiced over & over until he got it right; if we are always in a rush to complete chores so we can get to those “important projects”. Sometimes success is when we don’t get through the “to do” list. Instead, we stop long enough to NOTICE THE LITTLE THINGS. To savor every moment. Not only to notice the delight in our children’s eyes, but to help create that delight.
BEING WHERE YOU ARE, WHEN YOU ARE
and staying there as much as possible. Getting down on the floor and "getting delirious over the praying mantis your son just caught instead of perusing a fax or filling the dishwasher while he is yelling for your attention and you distractedly say over your shoulder: “Oh, honey, isn’t that a pretty bug.” It’s about being attuned enough to notice when your kid’s eyes shine so you can make your eyes shine back.”
"It's learning to love the journey, not the destination"
I desperately want my kids to see my eyes sparkle and shine when I play with them. I want to get down on the floor and "get delirious” over the simple things that inspire and entertain them. I want to enjoy and discover the world from their perspective.
This time with our young children slips away so fast. But the joy that I feel while I’m in the moment with my kids will not fade over the years like the pictures and the memories, it will become part of me. And it will become part of my kids. There will always be moments, okay, DAYS of frustration. When I've re-cleaned the same room 14 times, and already washed the load of laundry when someone hands me clothes that should have been in it. It will always take time to get everyone out the door for school with lunches and homework and clean teeth. But I’ve committed myself to changing my outlook.
I am so blessed! There are those out there with children suffering from illness, who can't make the pain go away. Those with children who are missing or who have died, and those who can't even have children! I am so blessed that I don't have those kinds of experiences. Even a "bad" day should be a great day because I have the opportunity to be a mother of these most precious souls. I have the opportunity to snuggle up with sweet smelling, clean kids in soft pajamas and read to them. I get to laugh when Bronson (truly) accidentally flings meatloaf off his plate which goes up into the air and then lands smack dab on his face. I get to listen to them declare "We're sleeping together !!" I get to hear them having a marvelous time belting out Camp Rock songs at 6:30 AM.
When I savor and soak up those day to day "moments", it makes all the frustrating stuff not so bad.
Speaking of savoring....I love that as a family we can create our own traditions. The night before school starts we have a tradition that we really "SAVOR" (more like salivate for :) ). Kind of like our "Salute to Summer" celebration. The girls get pedicures. And then we go out to dinner-for ICE CREAM. We are a pretty healthy family when it comes eating, needless to say the kids really enjoy dessert each night after dinner. But sometimes rules need to be broken, so we throw em' all out the window and pig out on ICE CREAM! I don't know exactly how this started, but anyone who knows me knows that I lOVE ice cream so I'm pretty sure it was my idea. They get to choose whatever flavor & toppings they want. MFY is one of our favs so they chose Golden Spoon, which is pretty much the same thing.
Filling up on each and every last bite of that sugary goodness....YUM!
I'm pretty sure that "finger" was NOT intentional!
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